What America Tastes Like

Bright Yellow Colorless Hot Dogs in New York

The hotdog flavor is tweaked to a savoriness that can only be compared to beef-jerky. But in a good way. The homogenous brown smear of “chili” has a texture an Icee machine might dispense. But in a good way.

I’d heard tales about “Gray’s Papaya” hotdogs from thousands of miles away, but without comprehending their actual color or relationship with fruit.

There are things in this world outside my understanding, yet now within my experience. I rode the subway beside these dogs and now appreciate their singular nature.

The papaya drink is like a Willy Wonka flavor. The initial sip can only be described as “nasty.” Then it evolves. Perhaps it uses the same technology Gene Wilder used to create “3-Course Meal Chewing Gum.”

Maybe it releases billions of tiny nanobots into your bloodstream that alter your DNA and sensory associations. The subjective experience changes after the first drink.

By the third sip it becomes addictive, as if somehow “powdered fruit and milk” was something your body asked for.

There is always one guy in the breakroom who gets FunYuns out of the vending machine. He gets them literally every day at lunch. From the wacky bright colors to the singular flavors, Gray’s defines itself in curious ways… that a chosen few will devote themselves to fully.

Gray’s might be processed just to please you, although that could be the nanites talking.

2090 Broadway
New York, New York



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